Narcissist is Love-blind, Haunted, Self-pitying

Sam Vaknin
2 min readDec 2, 2024

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Narcissists are love-blind. They offhandedly, absentmindedly, and contemptuously discard the greatest assets a human being could ever aspire to or have: the dedicated few who love them loyally, genuinely, dearly, profoundly, totally, and wholeheartedly.

But the ghosts of people past, ephemeral, ethereal, weigh heavily, threaten to suffocate. A cacophony of disembodied voices, disparaging, lamenting, befuddled, haughty, contemptuous, childlike, terrorized

Nothing is more stifling than the atmosphere abutting a decaying narcissist, this putrefaction, the end of a life most thwarted, a sepia apparition that is a stuttering, pallid, intermittent version of its embalmed former self, its juiceless battery bleeding the acid of surrender into a Lunar inner scape.

The gangrenous reeking of necrotic desolation, oozing apparent remorse. Alone, shunned, abandoned, hated, the narcissist disintegrates in slow but inexorable motion, a penumbral specter claiming counterfactual existence. A salted pillar, frozen and stultified, aghast at the unfolding calamity of his own, personal Sodom and Gomorrah.

It is time for soul-searching, but how, when one has never had a soul?

Nostalgia, the sadness of what could have been and never will occur, alternative histories, wrong turns in a road not travelled. Haunted by memories, hunted by failures, thwarted potentials, forsaken promises, the narcissist is besieged.

Not regretful or stricken by remorse, but wallowing in acidulous self-pity, consuming self-mourning, self-immolating grief.

Distant echoes and the rumblings of the end. Long separated from his virulent, insidious, surreptitious, life threatening shame, the narcissist, his defenses crumbled, is forced to confront it, multiplied and metastatic, fueled by decades of defeat and self-inflicted vitiation.

Worst are the images, beheaded faces afloat, disemboweled decontextualized memories, sharp as knives, the aimlessness of it all. Everything ruined, no legacy. The eviscerating shards of opportunities missed and fantasies shattered.

It is payback time for the pain and hurt he had caused, they catch up with him like catapulted boomerangs.

Collapse (dwindling supply), old tricks no longer work, superficial charm smarmy, his routines are boring, he is transparent and rejected as the loathsome nasty, and obnoxious person that s/he is.

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Author Bio

Sam Vaknin ( http://samvak.tripod.com/mediakit.html ) is the author of Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited as well as many other books and ebooks about topics in psychology, relationships, philosophy, economics, international affairs, and award-winning short fiction.

He is a Professor of Clinical Psychology and Management Studies in CIAPS (Commonwealth of International Advanced Professional Studies), Cambridge and Birmingham, UK; Ontario, Canada; Lagos, Nigeria; a Visiting Professor of Psychology and Economics in South East European University (SEEU); and a former Visiting Professor of Psychology, Southern Federal University, Rostov-on-Don, Russia.

He was the Editor-in-Chief of Global Politician and served as a columnist for Central Europe Review, PopMatters, eBookWeb , and Bellaonline, and as a United Press International (UPI) Senior Business Correspondent. He was the editor of mental health and Central East Europe categories in The Open Directory and Suite101. His YouTube channels garnered 100,000,000 views and 450,000 subscribers.

Visit Sam’s Web site at http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com

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Sam Vaknin
Sam Vaknin

Written by Sam Vaknin

Sam Vaknin ( http://samvak.tripod.com ) is the author of Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited and a Visiting Professor of Psychology

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